HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO US: This week marks the sixth anniversary of The Dead Drop. We are going to keep doing it until we get it right. In that first edition on July 31, 2016 we talked about senior officials throwing out first pitches at baseball games. Man, have times changed.
GAME OF THROWS: We want to be David Cohen when we grow up. He seems to have a lot of fun. A couple years ago he had a walk-on part in The Game of Thrones (he explained to us in 2019 how that came about) and now we hear the CIA Deputy Director got to throw out the first pitch at Fenway Park where his hometown Boston Red Sox were playing their arch enemies, the New York Yankees. “Our cousin from Boston” tells us the pitch was a strike and was praised by the Red Sox TV analysts who said Cohen would be “hard on right-handed batters and bad guys.” In addition to being interviewed on TV, Cohen (a former Cipher Brief expert) was also on the Red Sox radio network. The Yankees were at bat at the time and after the umps called a close pitch a ball, Cohen told play-by-play announcer Joe Castiglione: “the CIA does intelligence assessments, and I would assess that was a strike.” Making the most of the occasion, Cohen also delivered strong pitches for the CIA Officer’s Memorial Foundation and the Third Option Foundation.
KEEPING YOUR GUARDIANS UP: Continuing with the baseball theme for a moment, last week the ballclub that has been known as the Cleveland Indians for the past 106 years announced that starting next season, they will be called the Cleveland Guardians. What is it with Guardians? First the Space Force adopted that moniker (which didn’t impress us much) and now these guys? The name would make more sense for a team from north of the border since the Canadian national anthem promises that its citizens will “stand on guard for thee.” Unlike “Indians” – the new name will offend no one – unless you are offended by boring.
THIS WEEK IN “THE CIA DID IT” CONSPIRACY THEORIES: The Central Intelligence Agency gets blamed for all manner of dastardly things – only some of which they actually did. This week, we learned from the UK’s Daily Mail that declassified Czech intelligence documents from 1984 show a confusing plot involving an elaborate disinformation campaign conducted by Czech spies. The plan was designed to convince British Members of Parliament that they were getting nasty letters from the U.S. warning them not to confirm rumors that the CIA was behind the 1979 assassination of Lord Mountbatten as opposed to the real culprits, the Irish Republican Army. Apparently, the idea was to plant the notion that the CIA really did do it – by warning the British pols not to say that. We think. But that is not the weirdest “CIA did it” of the week. You may have seen a viral video of someone confronting Fox News personality Tucker Carlson at a fishing supply store in Montana and saying “Dude, you are the worst human being known to mankind.” Now, pay attention because this gets confusing. The guy who was reportedly casting this harsh judgment on Carlson is a fly fishing guide by the name of Dan Bailey. The incident happened in a place called “Dan Bailey’s Outdoor Company.” But apparently the confrontational Dan Bailey is totally unrelated to the guy who created the company (that guy died in 1982.) Dan being in “Dan Bailey’s” was just a coincidence…sort of like a guy named McDonald getting a Big Mac, we guess. But here is the spooky part, according to some folks on social media, the living Dan Bailey worked for an outfit called the Asia Foundation in Mongolia in 2007 and (they note) the Asia Foundation was “founded by the CIA.” (In 1951 by some accounts.) Jack Posobiec, a senior editor at Human Events tweeted (without further evidence): “Just In: The White House knew about the Tucker ‘confrontation’ and the entire set-up was planned out in advance, per WH official.” So, there you have it – the CIA allegedly sent an operative to Montana to say rude things to Tucker Carlson. This should be investigated – and also, someone should look into the death of the original Dan Bailey in 1982.
WHO YA GONNA CALL: The media needs to call someone inside government to sort all this crazy stuff out, right? Timothy Barrett, who - as the new Assistant DNI for Strategic Communications - will get to answer a lot of those calls. Barrett is moving to ODNI from CIA, where he spent three years as press secretary, so he’s had some good training for his new role. Apparently, he also served in the Navy, worked at NCTC, and was a Presidential Briefer among other things. We can’t help but wonder though, what’s the craziest thing he’s ever been asked? Maybe we’ll put a call in to the Assistant DNI’s office and ask.
POCKET LITTER: Bits and pieces of interesting /weird stuff we discovered:
OH, MOTHER: The Mother Jones website recently ran a piece asking the question: is actor Ashton Kutcher a CIA asset? The reason someone might think so is because the author stumbled across two social media posts. In one, from 2009, Kutcher wrote that he “spent the afternoon picking the brain of a former CIA guy.” And the other, nine years later, includes a picture of Kutcher with a CIA mug and the words: “Just sending out a morning shout to the men and woman (sic) of the intelligence community that keep us safe and protect our country. #gratitude #ty.” Digging into this mystery, the writer contacted Kutcher’s PR firm and asked: “Does Ashton do any work with the CIA or other U.S. national security agencies/does he want to?” Well, guess what? The PR firm did not respond. This undoubtedly proves that (a) the answer is: yes, (b) the answer is: no, or (c) the PR firm considers the questioner is an idiot for thinking clandestine CIA assets would post pictures of themselves on social media drinking from CIA coffee mugs.
HOMEWORK MISHAP: A civilian DOD employee pleaded guilty last week to mishandling classified information. Asia Janay Lavarello (aptly named for someone who was working for the U.S. Indo-Pacific Command) was on a six-month TDY assignment in the Philippines and was simultaneously working on a degree from the National Intelligence University. In March 2020 she hosted a dinner party in her Manila hotel room for three Americans whom she worked with at the U.S. embassy and two foreign nationals. According to Stars and Stripes, one of the American guests stumbled across a stack of documents in Lavarello’s bedroom marked “secret.” Ms. Lavarello explained to the guest that she was using the classified material to work on her thesis. According to court documents, despite being discovered, Asia did not return the documents to their proper secured area and was subsequently sent back to the US. Pro-tip for National Intelligence University students: do not take classified work home with you. But if you do, do not leave stacks of them lying around when you invite visitors for a dinner party.
YOUR HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT: Gather up interesting (but unclassified) nuggets about national security, foreign policy, and intelligence. Write “definitely not secret but should be” at the top, scan and send them in an email to TheDeadDrop@theCipherBrief.com.
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