Dead Drop: December 8

KREMLIN KEYSTONE CLOWN-CAR:  Vladimir Zavadsky is the latest Russian general reportedly killed in Ukraine. While the reports are a bit sketchy, some say the Major General, who was deputy commander of the 14th Army Corps, decided to take a ride in a vehicle that had been seized from the Ukrainian Armed Forces. Apparently, not everyone got the word and some Russian troops started shelling the vehicle with mortar fire. According to at least one account, Zavadsky panicked and drove into a Russian minefield and had a close encounter of the worst kind with one of his own mines. If you are keeping count at home, his death marks the seventh Russian general killed in the war in Ukraine according to the Russians, but the twelfth, according to the Ukrainians. Naturally, Russian armed forces were reportedly attempting to cover up the cause of Zavadsky’s demise – and were blaming it on Ukrainian artillery fire. Telegram channels, however confirmed that he died “as a result of a mine explosion in the rear area…” (which sounds especially painful).

AMMO COOKOFF: If you think that bit of stupidity from the Russian Army is hard to top – the Russian Marines say: “hold my beer” (or maybe vodka.)  According to the U.K.’s Daily Mail, a dozen “elite” Russian marines were killed and 8 more wounded when they were cooking food on an open fire close to where they were storing live ammunition.  According to reports, an RFG-7 grenade launcher shell somehow “rolled into the fire” that was warming lunch and soon the marines were toast. The incident happened in the Rostov region, bordering Ukraine and in keeping with tradition, the Russian armed forces were reportedly attempting to cover it up.