KREMLIN KEYSTONE CLOWN-CAR: Vladimir Zavadsky is the latest Russian general reportedly killed in Ukraine. While the reports are a bit sketchy, some say the Major General, who was deputy commander of the 14th Army Corps, decided to take a ride in a vehicle that had been seized from the Ukrainian Armed Forces. Apparently, not everyone got the word and some Russian troops started shelling the vehicle with mortar fire. According to at least one account, Zavadsky panicked and drove into a Russian minefield and had a close encounter of the worst kind with one of his own mines. If you are keeping count at home, his death marks the seventh Russian general killed in the war in Ukraine according to the Russians, but the twelfth, according to the Ukrainians. Naturally, Russian armed forces were reportedly attempting to cover up the cause of Zavadsky’s demise – and were blaming it on Ukrainian artillery fire. Telegram channels, however confirmed that he died “as a result of a mine explosion in the rear area…” (which sounds especially painful).
AMMO COOKOFF: If you think that bit of stupidity from the Russian Army is hard to top – the Russian Marines say: “hold my beer” (or maybe vodka.) According to the U.K.’s Daily Mail, a dozen “elite” Russian marines were killed and 8 more wounded when they were cooking food on an open fire close to where they were storing live ammunition. According to reports, an RFG-7 grenade launcher shell somehow “rolled into the fire” that was warming lunch and soon the marines were toast. The incident happened in the Rostov region, bordering Ukraine and in keeping with tradition, the Russian armed forces were reportedly attempting to cover it up.
TRICK OR TREAT: Not every Russian serviceman who dies, does so at the hands of his incompetent comrades. Some die with the help of Ukrainians. According to the Kyiv Post “two nice girls” went to a military checkpoint in Simferopol, Crimea and brought snacks for the troops. The care package allegedly included vodka, fish, sausage, bread and cheese. Oh, and poison. A Ukrainian partisan group calling themselves the “Crimean Combat Seagulls” said that 24 Russian soldiers died, and 11 others were hospitalized. It is impossible to confirm the details of all these wacky stories about Russians getting whacked but there seems to be an endless supply of Kremlin troops meeting inglorious ends. Want another?
DAMNED IF YOU DO…. Once again, we turn to the Kyiv Post, which quotes Ukrainian intelligence officials confirming that Russian forces are using drones to kill their own troops to keep them from surrendering. A downside is that means Ukraine has fewer Russian POWs available for prisoner swaps.
BEIJING’S ‘DECEMBER TO REMEMBER’ SALE: The Financial Times reports that the Russian military is buying up hundreds of Chinese all-terrain vehicles for use in Ukraine. The buggies built by Shandong Odes Industries are popular in the U.S. among farmers and sporting enthusiasts. Russian President Vladimir Putin was pictured recently inspecting some of vehicles dubbed “Desertcross 1000-3’s” during a visit to a military headquarters. While China says they are not selling military equipment to Russia, the off-road vehicles come close – and Beijing risks having sanctions applied and tariff’s driving the prices of the buggies which are sold in great numbers in the U.S. – skyward.
GOD AWFUL ANALYSIS: Russian Media Monitor Julia Davis captured former CIA analyst Larry Johnson appearing live in studio with Russia state TV bloviator Vladimir Solovyov. Johnson said the U.S. has much in common with Russia and Americans should bond with Moscow on the basis of religion. Johnson’s most famous bit of public prognostication came in a piece he wrote for The New York Times in July 2001, where he mocked those who were overly concerned about the threat of terror in the United States. In his OPED he wrote that if you lived in the U.S. you had “little to fear” from terrorists. As you may recall, that bit of analysis did not age well. Spies tell us Johnson was a low-level analyst for the CIA for just four years, three decades ago. Go figure.
POCKET LITTER: Dead Droplets and bits and pieces of interesting /weird stuff we discovered:
SAY IT AIN’T SO! Former CIA analyst and current bestselling novelist David McCloskey has been rolling out some Tik Tok videos (available on some non-Chinese controlled social media platforms, too.) In the videos, he pokes holes in what he calls some common misperceptions about the sexy world of espionage. We told you last week, that he announced to the world that CIA Officers are not really ‘hot’, like they are in the movies. Since then, he has addressed some other issues that we didn’t know were issues. Among the latest, a post that explains if you think CIA parties are “all glamor and tuxedos and martinis” – think again. They are more like church potlucks, he says. We’re pretty sure he was kidding. Not kidding, however, was former CIA operations officer (and Cipher Brief expert) John Sipher, who explained that fellow operators “never invited you brainiac analysts to our good parties. Africa Division has a daiquiri maker. My stations had every kind of scotch and cigars.” That explains so much…
WE’D HAVE A HECKUVA HOLIDAY PARTY IF YOU’D SERVE UP SOME OF YOUR FINEST NEWS TIPS. DON’T MAKE US RELY ON POTLUCK. SEND WHAT YOU’VE GOT TO: TheDeadDrop@theCipherBrief.com
