IARPA FOR THE WIN: On Tuesday January 20, Dr. Catherine Marsh, director of the Intelligence Advanced Research Projects Activity (say that three times fast) joins Cipher Brief CEO & Publisher Suzanne Kelly for a briefing about her agency’s top initiatives for 2022 – but you don’t have to wait until then for a bit of brilliance from IARPA. Although the year is young – we are awarding IARPA the “Best Acronym of 2022” trophy. On January 4, they posted a request for information (RFI) for what is called “Smart Electrically Powered and Networked Textile Systems (SMART e-PANTS)”. What does that mean? According to the notice: “The military, first responders…and professional athletes alike desire electronics that can help keep people safe by sensing, processing and communicating information on individuals’ location and physical surroundings (audio and video recording). Integration of these capabilities into textiles for greater capability, comfort and convenience has long been envisioned, free of uncomfortable, bulky, rigid devices strapped to their bodies. Cipher Brief readers are already SMART-E Pants – but you probably already knew that.
NOT SO SMART PANTS: We know COVID has caused some uncomfortable problems with the international supply chain – but just how awkward the situation had become was brought home to us via an article in the Washington Post which said that things have gotten so bad for the Norwegian military – that new recruits are being ordered to wear previously used undergarments “including socks, bras and underwear” that have been returned by other conscripts who had fulfilled their duty. This raised a number of questions in our minds. One was settled when a little research told us that Norway drafts both men and women – so it is unlikely that the guys are being issued used bras. But still, this is terrible. Norway is a NATO ally. Instead of sending them MRAPs or F-35s, the U.S. should be sending our allies C-5’s full of BVDs. The Post piece was full of information that was new to us – including the fun fact that the U.S. Marine Corps only recently deep sixed their “male-only underwear allowance” which amounted to (and we are not making this up) “72 cents per year.” What are male Marine warriors doing now without this generous stipend? Depends. Maybe they’re going commando.
FIGHTING OLD BATTLES: One thing you can count on in the national security realm is that some stories keep getting told and re-told repeatedly. One of the of the recycled chestnuts is outrage over the idea that the Pentagon and Intelligence Community are manipulating hearts and minds via Hollywood. In its six and a half year long existence, the Dead Drop has pointed out at least three or four cases where journalists think they have stumbled across this bombshell. Here’s another. There is a forthcoming film called “Theaters of War: How the Pentagon and CIA Took Hollywood” (trailer here) that is set to appear (somewhere – unclear where) next month. The film relies on interviews and FOIA’d documents that seem to show DOD and the IC care about their image. An article in WorldBeyondWar.org says the film ends with a recommendation that movies be required to disclose at the start if they include any military or CIA collaboration. Thank goodness for that. Until now, we thought all those aircraft carriers and fighter planes in the Top Gun movies were part of Tom Cruise’s personal arsenal.
IT IS NOT JUST THE PUBLIC: Taking a considerably more academic approach to the subject of the collision of national security and entertainment – is a piece in The Atlantic by Amy Zegart titled, “How Fake Spies Ruin Real Intelligence.” Zegart’s contention is that the public knows little about intelligence – and much of what they know is wrong thanks to the movies and TV. Add to that – she thinks that the views of some of the people working in national security – have been tainted by the same exaggerated stuff they and the public sees in the theaters. The article is drawn from Zegart’s forthcoming book, Spies, Lies, and Algorithms: The History and Future of American Intelligence. (Look for a review of that book in The Cipher Brief in the coming months.) Zegart opens her article by describing that the visitors entrance to CIA headquarters has a “shabby post-office feel” and that visitors seem disappointed that the lobby contains “no retina scanners or fancy fingerprint devices, just a few turnstiles and a friendly security guard who takes cellphones and hands out paper claim checks.” Yeah, that would make a great Jason Bourne movie. We agree with the last line in Zegart’s article which quotes former NSA and CIA Director General Mike Hayden saying, “The American people have to trust us, and in order to trust us they have to know about us.”
IN THE WORLD OF ESPIONAGE, TIME MATTERS: An anonymous former CIA Operative has written a ‘timely’ account of what it was like to recruit spies and steal secrets in a rather unlikely place. The website for timepiece afficionados, Hodinkee has published a rather interesting second by second account of how the former spook relied on his upscale timepieces for meetings with assets. The anonymous author writes, “During an intelligence operation, mere seconds can mean the difference between life and death, imprisonment or (potentially worse) failing to collect strategic intelligence. So, it’s no surprise that the intelligence business – foreign intelligence collection, covert action and counterintelligence – is inextricably linked to reliable, even luxury, timepieces.” Our own sources tell us that folks on the payroll who are doing this kind of work today can’t afford some of the wristwear, but hey, why ruin a good story?
AND IF YOU DON’T MIND SOME MORE SIZZLE: A few weeks ago, the Dead Drop mentioned the new female-centric spy movie called, “The 355.” The release of that flick caused someone at BuzzFeed to assemble their list of what they call “35 of the Best Female Spy Movies Ever Made.” Frankly, the author must have had to struggle to hit the number 35. Quite a few of the movies they cite are ones we never heard of…and others are a stretch to consider “female spy movies,” For example, number 8 on their list is the motion picture remake of “Get Smart” where the lead woman, Agent 99, is very much supporting cast.
NANNY STATE: The website ClearanceJobs.com this week, took on an unusual question from an aspirant for an intelligence job: “Will my illegal nanny tank my chances of working for the CIA?” This purportedly is a question from an attorney who hopes to land a job with the Agency – but has been paying under the table, a childcare helper with an expired green card. ClearanceJobs’ answer (as we understand it) was essentially – pay the back taxes now – and cross your fingers. Good bet any attorneys applying for work at CIA for the foreseeable future will be getting nanny questions on their polygraphs.
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT: The conservative outfit Judicial Watch thinks the CIA may have been conspiring with the military regarding the past administration conspiring about them. Or something. Judicial Watch has filed a FOIA lawsuit against the CIA for records of communications between former CIA Director Gina Haspel and Chairman of the Joint Chiefs General Mark Milley. They are asking for all records of communications and meetings between the two from November 1, 2020, until January 20, 2021. The suit was apparently sparked by press accounts which alleged that Haspel told Milley that "We are on the way to a right-wing coup…" Sigh.
POCKET LITTER: Dead Droplets and bits and pieces of interesting /weird stuff we discovered:
ARMY SGT PARKS SHARK: Somehow we missed this back in 2019, but Army Sgt. 1st Class Lincoln Crisler (which sounds like a made-up name) became momentarily famous when, as a drill sergeant, he called cadence to the tune (if you can call it that) of “Baby Shark.” As Stars and Stripes puts it – Crisler now has a new plan for what he will “doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo.” He has just released the first of a series of “horror-inspired comic books” as he prepares to hang up his uniform later this year. We’ll pass on the comics – the “Baby Shark” stuff was horrifying enough.
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